damn you

Step by step, heart to heart, left right left...

Prayer... something i have not done for a very long time.

faith... something i left behind a long time ago.

both of these are things that i so need... and i hope i found... As i knelt beside Adeline in Church, i found myself praying... praying about the many things that weighed my mind, my heart down.. and it felt good, to talk to God. Why have i not done this before? I honestly do not know.

Church... it brought back a tidal wave of memories, sweet, sour, bittersweet... From Amy to Charlotte, From ShunJing to Jonathan... so many people that i have met, some i got close to... others i found something special in, but... it was not meant for us to discover where we could have gone together.

Peace people... Good Friday...

and i thank you for the day, that you took my sins away

i want....

1. a battery powered table lamp
2. a "breakfast-in-bed" table
3. a reclining bed
4. sleep
5. sleep
6. Guess

why?

coz im so bloody beat thats why.

National School Bloggin Competition

yep... u heard me right.. between June and Aug. The entire school will have a blog to call its own, got a feeling that everyone will have access to it(Hell for moderators) and we have to talk about edu stuff(Im sure u can classify most things under GP:P)

on another note, added the comment code to my blog... hope its workin ok. i noe it looks ugly.. but i'll fix it. WHEN I HAVE THE TIME.

English... the language is beautiful, so... its time for me to brush up on my english and stop marring its beauty. ciao singlish, Welcome... mein ol' friend...

Test title

This is a test post... making some changes to my code... ignore

Ladies + Computing

HARD-DISK Woman:
She remembers everything, FOREVER.

RAM Woman:
She forgets about you, the moment you turn her off.

WINDOWS Woman:
Everyone knows that she can't do a thing right, but no one can live without her.

EXCEL Woman:
They say she can do a lot of things but you mostly use her for your four basic needs.

SCREENSAVER Woman:
She is good for nothing but at least she is fun!

INTERNET Woman:
Difficult to access.

SERVER Woman:
Always busy when you need her.

MULTIMEDIA Woman:
She makes horrible things look beautiful.

CD-ROM Woman:
She is always faster and faster.

E-MAIL Woman:
Every ten things she says, eight are nonsense.


VIRUS Woman:
Also known as "WIFE"; when you are not expecting her, she comes, installs herself and uses all your resources. If you try to uninstall her you will lose something, if you don't try to uninstall her you will lose everything............


im amused

slick slick slick...

No more parties...

drip...

no more games....

drip...

freedom

R.I.P dearest AnT@euS

drip...

its alright, im ok, i think god can explain...

Well... that ends it! 4 days straight of CIP.. ow... Sat, Sun, Mon, Tue.... nearly the whole day gone every day. But in serving the community, i really did feel enriched... maybe there is some merit to doing these things.

DAY 1 - Family Day @ ACJC sponsored by MINDS and NeWater

preperations went smoothly enough, when the buses started to unload the people though... it felt hard to keep that smile in place as the diff people came, looking slightly lost and all, in some way, had their shortcomings showing physicall. I just felt so sorry for these people and the normal life they had been denied.

thoughts of unfairness and injustice filtered through my mind.

yet, as they walked past me(the usher at the gate) many stopped to smile and say hi...

ignorance is bliss?

my heart was just.... wrenched... there is no other way of saying it... and yet with all that they did not have, they were joyful about the things that they DID have, like the volunteers who came along with them, people with sincere hearts and beautiful souls, like their family who came along on the hot day just to be with them...Their enthuism made this so much more enjoyable than i thought possible.

my cup overfloweth...

DAY 2 - Science Center & RTC stayover

okie... SC was as fun as always, though yeah, nothing changes that dramatically... people were friendly and generally approachable. Good Singaporeans. Pretty much nothing happened over the 3 days so yeah. just liddat lorh.

rest... i need rest....

haha... went to meet the guys at NetSpiel at arnd 8 on Sat, and played til like 1am.. haha... nuts right? then went back to RTC with them and slept while they played...(had to go for Science Center the nxt day)

Hmm... all this CIP... pretty worn out:P gonna study with Adel now...

i know why people drink now, why they take drugs... its to forget... forget the pain, the humdrum, the loser-ness of their lives... i know now...

Never ever - all saints

A few questions that I need to know
How you could ever hurt me so
I need to know what i've done wrong
And how long it's been going on
Was it that I never paid enough attention
Or did I not give enough affection
Not only will your answers keep me sane
But i'll know never to make the same mistake again
You can tell me to my face
Or even on the phone
You can write it in a letter
Either way i've have to know
Did I never treat you right
Did I always start the fight
Either way i'm going out of my mind
All the answers to my questions
I have to find

My head's spinnin' Boy i'm in a daze
I feel isolated
Don't wanna communicate
I take a shower
I will scour
I will roam
To find peace of mind
The happy mind I once owned yeah
Flexing vocabulary runs right through me
The alphabet runs right from a to z
Conversations, hesatations in my mind
You got my conscience
Asking questions that I can't find
I'm not crazy I'm sure I aint done nothing wrong,
No I'm just waiting cos I heard that this feeling won't last that long

Never ever have I ever felt so low
When you gonna take me out of this black hole
Never ever have I ever felt so sad
The way i'm feeling yeah you got me feeling really
Never ever have I had to find
I've had to dig away to find my own piece of mind
I've never ever had my conscience to fight
The way i'm feeling yeah it just don't feel right
I'll keep searching
Deep within my soul
For all the answers
Don't wanna hurt no more I need peace gotta feel at ease
Need to be Free from pain
Go insane My heart aches yeah
Sometimes vocabulary runs through my head
The alphabet runs right from a to z
Conversations, hesatations in my mind
You got my concience asking questions that i can't find
I'm not crazy I'm sure I aint done nothing wrong
Now i'm just awaiting cos I heard that this feeling won't last that long

chorus

You can tell me to my face
You can tell me on the phone
Oooh you can write it in a letter babe
Cos I really need to know
You can write it in a letter babe
You can write in in a letter babe(fade)

Computing... again.... slack!

My throat hurts... bad.... REAL bad... buah. hopefully it will recover by Saturday... whee! ok, lack of thinking now. must catch up with all my work... ie stop blogging and start working... nah... :P

virn: add me as an admin to ur blog:D then i can help u edit. me like being co-author...

lex: yoz! gv me a call when u get back to s'pore. Kei is hving a stay over this Sat... bring the booze...

in the end...

I'll explain in due time...
hurt... incredibly hurt. why does it have to be so...
I must concentrate on work... on doing everything right... YES i will do it
coz i have nothing else
this is my vow... this is my goal...
why oh why did u do thisfor i still love you so...

I need to sleep

haha... in computing again... damn slack lah... but i need to catch up with the practicals, kinda got them piling up. GP sucked... managed to fill in every thing, but spent the last 2 mins bullshitting to fill up empty spaces.

*stretch.. ok, for those who asked abt the blog skin... i guess i wanted something simple and white, and the words "bucking the trend" are a clue as to what the Boxes in the background mean. Just trying to represent a thought that has been running through my mind recently.

How different are you?

ok... this color thing isnt working for me... i'll stop now...

but all it really takes is just one person to start breaking the trend, to start questioning, then everything starts to break apart... to break free... haha... it might be bad, it might be good... you'd never know. but i believe that in the Chaos, a new leader will emerge and again a trend will form, better... evolved. And again... the trend will be broken... get me?

haha... dosen't matter, im just talking crap now. Not in much of a state to think, been sleeping too little for my body

Reformatting

heya... gonna do a clean format of my computer... so yeah, won't be online for sometime..:D

WelcomeCreated on the 5th of March... or was it the 6th? it was around midnight anyway so yeah... go figure:D This marks my 1st foray into Javascripting(SIMPLE) and actually title-ing the blog skin... "bucking the trend..." but i doubt that u'll be seeing the name AnT@euS at blogskins.com anytime soon...

Doodle has cut our subscriptions

hey guys... if u had a basic plan for doodle(free plan) they have cut off the service. so yeah... change to tagboard or smtng...:/