Power... Fear... Pain...

what makes a man? power? strength?

ever felt the need to be power incarnate? have absolute control and not fear any of the consequences? have every single thing you ever wanted and more? to be free of pain?

My entire soul has been in turmoil for 2 months... and yet i still have not resolved the pain.. the fear.. will i ever been able to rid myself of these demons?

I'm trying so hard to hold on to myself.. so hard to not be lost in this swirl of hatred. To lose myself...

there are moments of sanity and more of insanity. like sitting next to an mg with live rounds sitting in a box. haha... fucking insanity. but hey... i'll never do something stupid. no worries.

always trying to be a superhero... haha... what a joke.

well... if you have any words... any words i can cling on to for sanity's sake. please. Thank you...

its the choices that make us who we are.